Life Statistics Program

My friend Rich recently proposed what our lives would be like if we could use keyboard shortcuts. Examples being command + Z to undo something like overcooking a pizza or maybe forgetting to do something special for Valentines Day, and command + V for pasting in duplicates of things that you want more of like beer. Anyway, I really liked the discussion we had, and one thing I’ve been thinking about since then is what if there were a statistics-reporting program for life (the same way you can look at statistics from your web site for example)? Some of the things I would like to instantly know are:

  • How many total words have I said, written, typed
  • How many unique words do I have in my vocabulary (I surprised the wife last week by pulling out “barrage” which apparently I had never said before)
  • How many hours/minutes have I spent watching tv, riding the bus, sleeping, on the internet, designing, in meetings, talking on the phone/wanting to get off the phone, yelling/arguing, crying (who are we kidding, I’ve never cried), laughing, having fun

Which reminds me of this great life statistics chart from “Saving Silverman”
Saving Silverman Fun Level Chart
On with the list

  • How many miles/feet have I crawled, walked, run, driven, ridden my bike
  • How many movies (which ones) have I seen, and how many were awful
  • How many people are in my first (second, third, etc) circle of friends/acquaintances
  • How many beers have I drank, in kegs of course
  • How many fanny packs do I own, that’s simple 42, all either fluorescent purple or turquoise, in a box in my basement

I could go on, but I won’t.


  1. Keyboard shortcuts? Sounds like you must’ve been watching an Adam Sandler movie called ‘Click’ at the time….

    By the way, if you want to know all those stats on your life, just ask the government.

    Sweet picture from ‘Saving Silverman’!

    - Russ (Feb 14, 2007)

  2. “Just ask the government.” Scary, but probably true. Pretty interesting post.

    - Hulles (Feb 15, 2007)

  3. Interesting premise, now take it one step further; I wish I could just hit a key and do an entire sequence of things, such as:
    Command + kissandmakeup when nicole is made at me; Command + Homework = essay written, research done, etc Command + Car =new oil change, tires rotated and fully inflated Command + cook = 3 course meal…now that would be awesome…since you’ve never cried, I wonder if your tears, like Chuck Norris’, cure cancer…

    - mark sier (Feb 16, 2007)

  4. Haha, Great blog post! I love that scene in Saving Silverman. That’s actually what brought me here.

    - Biztone (Dec 15, 2008)

  5. Thanks Biztone! Yeah Saving Silverman is a great show, used to watch it all the time in my college house.

    - Rett (Dec 16, 2008)

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